Sometimes they Haunt you for No Reason, and you Wonder Why...

Yes, so, thoughts of my ex's, ALL my ex's, have been haunting me lately. Wondering why, and how, what I did wrong, Why it went wrong, and when I'll meet someone that we're both what the other is looking for. I've got lots of time. I'm only 19. But still. Maybe it's the music I've been listening to. Anyway, I present you with Song Lyrics.

Avril Lavigne: So Much for My Happy Ending

So much for my happy ending
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh, oh...

Let's talk this over
It's not like we're dead
Was it something I did?
Was it something You said?
Don't leave me hanging
In a city so dead
Held up so high
On such a breakable thread

You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

CHORUS
You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
All of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh

You've got your dumb friends
I know what they say
They tell you I'm difficult
But so are they
But they don't know me
Do they even know you?
All the things you hide from me
All the shit that you do

You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
All of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh


It's nice to know that you were there
Thanks for acting like you cared
And making me feel like I was the only one
It's nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall
And letting me know we were done

You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
All of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending

You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
All of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh


oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
oh oh, oh oh, oh...


Savage Garden: The Lover After Me

Here I go again I promised myself I wouldn't think of you today
It's been seven months and counting
You've moved on
I still feel exactly the same
It's just that everywhere I go all the buildings know your name
Like photographs and memories of love
Steel and granite reminders
The city calls your name and I can't move on

Ever since you've been gone
The lights go out the same
The only difference is
You call another name
To your love
To your lover now
To your love
The lover after me

Am I all alone in the universe?
There's no love on these streets
I have given mine away to a world that didn't want it anyway
So this is my new freedom
It's funny
I don't remember being chained
But nothing seems to make sense anymore
Without you I'm always twenty minutes late

Ever since you've been gone
The lights go out the same
The only difference is
You call another name
To your love
To your lover now
To your love
The lover after me

And time goes by so slowly
The nights are cold and lonely
I shouldn't be holding on
But I'm still holding on for you

Here I go again
I promised myself I wouldn't think of you today
But I'm standing at your doorway
I'm calling out your name because I can't move on

Ever since you've been gone
The lights go out the same
The only difference is
You call another name
To your love
To your lover now
To your love
The lover after me

Things I ought to know

there is one Obvious person whom this does not apply to, she knows who she is as this is her lap top I'm using while she's asleep.

I really ought to know by now:
Not to count on anyone
To never make plans based of what anyone else says they'll do
I really ought to know
That what I'd do for most anyone
Especially those special anyones
does not necessicarily hold true
that they will do for me
I ought to know by now
Cicumstances will interfere
that I am not quite dear enough
to be placed above close second
or even distant second,
when I place at all.
I really ought to know
better than to be hurt when it turns out
there's no one I can count on
and that I'm not important enough
to have anyone willing to go out of their way
so they can help me out.
I ought to know better
than to just close myself down
and I ought to know better
than to be upset
and I ought to know better
than to care
and I ought to know better
than to even think about it
Because I don't matter enough,
for it to matter at all

this is how I'm feeling right now, not necessisarily all the time, but right now or often enough. and obviously I'm not brave enough, to stick this where they'll see it. Or am I? It's not totally accurate, I mean, Nikki did a lot to help me out.