On the way Home

Riding home from the petrol station, I realized I'm sick of being the one to reach out. This goes to a certain set of friends, whom when ever I get depressed I realize I'm ALWAYS the one to reach out to. I'm SICK of it. Here's a list of who reaches out to me

Jennifer

Justin

Leeta

*rechecks her Buddy List*

Tim, occasionally

Joana and I stay in touch, sort of

Nikki, though we're not close

Yep, that's it, all the friends who keep in touch really well. Folks like Tema and Hope keep in touch thru blog, but a.) I'm not as close to them as a LOT of other people, and b.) blogging isn't the same as other ways.

Now, they get an excuse, they're really busy, and while I consider them friends, we're not like really close friends. But for the folks I'm close to (real life folks, not really anyone online) that don't keep in touch, YES, they're busy, but damn it, I stay pretty busy too, and I dont' want to make the effort, and there are times when I'm like, "I ought to just stop trying" (which you can see by how I write this every few months. I shouldn't write anymore of this, it depresses me more.